The Underground River, Part I

I know my last post was about digging. But there's a lot to be said about it, so I'm gonna keep riding the wave. I'm also going to split this one up into two parts, because there's a lot to say...

I've been doing a lot of digging into the mysterious inner wiring of my deep self, the stuff that's buried under layer upon layer of subconscious sediment, the kind of stuff that only hints at its true source through those numerous little "geysers" of wants and desires I feel in my daily life.

Why do I want the things I want? Why do I chase the things I chase so very hard? And what is it really that makes the objects of my desires worth it?

This blind faith that when I reach my goal, I will finally experience real happiness... where does it come from?

With these questions, I'm digging to find a spiritual undercurrent that might lead me to uncovering more of my Original Design. Some of the answers can be scary, but without them, how can I make it to the truth?

I want to lay out a metaphor for you.

The Thirsty Traveller Metaphor

A man was wandering out in the wilderness, looking for any trace of water. His map had led him astray, and it had been a long time since he'd seen another person or any real sustenance. He'd found a puddle on a rock here and there, but not enough to give any real life to his body. But at night, when he laid his head down on the ground to rest, he could swear he heard the sound of rushing water. 

The possibility of an underground river was driving him mad.

Finally, he decided to take his tools and start at the ground. If that sound truly was rushing water, then nothing was more important than getting to it. But it was a gamble. Would he lose time, effort, and sweat looking for something that wasn't there?

It didn't matter; he was sick of living puddle to puddle out in the wilderness. And besides, if he could just figure out the direction the water was rushing to, he would surely find an oasis...

His hands blistered and his tools blunted, the man used all of his waning strength to pull away the thick and sturdy layers of sand, dirt, and rock from the ground. He'd bet too much to stop now. He was all in. He dug for hours and hours, his muscles sore and his head spinning from fatigue and dehydration. And finally, with one of his scoops, his hole began to fill with sandy, gritty liquid. He had finally found the water.

But where was it heading to? 

It was time to keep digging, to get a direction as to where that oasis could be...

Our Original Design's secrets are at the mouth of a subconscious river. 

But which way is the river flowing? In order to get closer to the mouth, you've gotta know where it's headed.

My friend Pua and I were talking earlier this year about clothes (I know a lot about clothes (I don't)), and something interesting came up in the conversation. Pua is passionate about "fair trade" clothes, which, if you don't know, means she only buys clothes from companies who give their overseas employees fair working conditions. No slavery, no sweat shops, no malpractice. This can be more expensive than normal clothing prices, because honest work costs more.

At one point as we were talking, Pua yelled, "Why do I care so much about how clothes are made?!" And that's when it hit us. Pua's passion shows that her heart flows in a certain direction. There's something deeper going on, and her passion for fair trade clothes is that deeper thing rising to the surface. What could it be? That's the exciting part!

So how do I find a "river" to follow?

Your desires will give you a great starting direction. What do you want? What do you like? What do you wish for in your unedited thoughts? Why? Those questions help to uncover what your deep self is truly after. You can make some good guesses about where the oasis is if you can figure out where the river is pointing.

Just to be clear, I want to define the oasis. My oasis is the place in my relationship with God where my deep, unique, intimate needs are met by the parts of His personality that He designed me to uniquely connect with the most. These are the parts of Himself that He was most excited to uniquely share with me when He first thought about making me!

Here's my logic behind all this:

1. We all long for things (many of them unique), and we don't know why.
2. As a Christian, I believe that we were made for God.

If both of these things are true, then this is a logical assumption:


Each unique thing a person longs for is a CLUE to the specific parts of God that that specific person identifies with. And these parts of God are the places where he most wants to connect with each of us, in our special places not shared by just any other person. These are the parts that come alive in that familiar pleasurable/painful way when we watch that specific movie, or read that specific book, or hear that specific song. It's the underground river.

These places in which He's connected to me have been some of the most meaningful connections I've ever experienced. And we are all, of course, alike in many ways in how we were made to connect with God. But I'm convinced that God made us unique because he wanted to connect with us uniquely, too. That's what intimacy really is, right? What's intimacy without having something special between two people?

One of my biggest connection places with God is adventure... What are yours?


Follow the Stream to find out.